Family Matters

Ah. I feel good today. I just unfriended my sister on Facebook. Yay! She may be my sister but she is not my friend. I have to get some things off my chest. Recently, my brother was hospitalized to have some colon cancer removed. This is his second bout with cancer. His first cancer was stage 4 non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. He is also afflicted with adolescent-onset of Diabetes, which in later life has caused him to lose more than half of his right foot.

While he was in the hospital, my siblings and I were there to visit him. My older brother from North Carolina flew in to see him and to visit my oldest brother, who was also hospitalized with some serious ailments. My oldest sister and her husband came from Omaha, as well as the sister non-Grata, who lives in Des Moines.

The family had to leave the hospital room while the hospital staff moved my brother around and  helped him use the bathroom, etc.

While my brother from North Carolina and my two sisters were out in the hallway, we all started to get caught up on information from our lives. My oldest son, Ryan, was there with me to visit his uncle in the hospital as well. We had good news to share as Ryan had just completed his first full year of college at my old Alma-mater, Grand View. We had just been notified that Ryan made the Dean's list and had been awarded $3,000 in tuition grants. As soon as Pat (sister non-Grata) heard the good news, she starts telling my son what he should do in school, and  what occupation he should pursue. Wow. First of all, I politely reminded her that I am his mother and that Ryan and I discuss his college plans, and that doesn't include her input. Ryan chimed in with basically the same information, to which she exclaimed how she had gotten much more money when she was getting her degree.

Pat began by telling this stupid story about when she received her diploma, there was a 'funny sticker on it that read "Sum ma Cum Lade" on it.' She laughed and laughed because that meant she was going to get much more money, like $5,000.

Let me just say to anyone who has ever had to work, and work hard, that achieving "Sum ma Cum Lauder" does not come with little to no effort. Anyone who actually worked for straight A's would be well aware of it before they received their diploma. Pat never did her own homework, struggled through papers with dull and unintelligent writing (her teacher told her that), and she is just not the sharpest knife in the drawer, if you know what I mean. Besides the fact that you don't get awarded tuition money after you 'graduate'.

All that aside, I asked Pat what her degree was in. Her eyes shot red daggers at me, as she feigned she did not hear me. So I asked her again what her degree was in that she had just gotten "Sum ma Cum Laude", you know, "highest honors". You see, Pat and my sister from Omaha, Mary, had just declared war on my brother from North Carolina. Pat and Mary think they are in charge of what family is allowed to come visit other family members when they are sick or dying. Like when my own mother and father were dying, Mary told me not to come to the hospital until they had both died. So I never got closure or got to say good bye to my Mom and Dad. Later I found out from a cousin of mine, in a Christmas newsletter no less, that  Mary had been present when both of my parents had died (different years), and none of the other 'children' (my brothers and I) were concerned enough to show up. I learned from that bullshit that nobody can decide for me whether or not I can see family members in the hospital. Mary and Pat have even gone so far as to not disclose what hospital my brother was in when he had stage 4 cancer previously. So I had to call around to see where he was. He was glad to see me then, too.

Back to the New World War that Pat and Mary were planning with my brother that flew in from North Carolina, I declared that I was Switzerland, which angered both of my older sisters. Too bad. Life is too short to be warring. I'm not interested in being a party to their pettiness.

When Pat finally answered what degree she had received with "highest honors" she revealed that it was in "Psychology", to every one's shock. I'm no Psych major but when I took several classes in college, every Psych professor informed the class that the only reason 98% of Psych majors go into the profession is to find out what is mentally wrong with themselves. With that knowledge in mind, it's easy to see why Pat had chosen that field; she is bat shit crazy. Her pretending to be knowledgeable  about Psychology could only be described as pouring gasoline on her hair and lighting it on fire- dangerous.

After the initial shock wore off a bit later about Pat's new found 'occupation', I queried her about whether she was working in her 'field'. She answered that she worked with little kids in elementary school. So I repeated my question, and she answered "No, not in my field,". Thank God for small miracles!!! I can't think of anything more damaging to a young psyche than having Pat's loony business going in and scrambling their poor young brains.

To my knowledge, this is Pat's second degree- the first one is for a social worker- again, dangerous territory for destroying perfectly normal lives. Pat claimed it was "very inappropriate" for my son to buy me perfume for a Christmas present because she didn't like the name of the fragrance! Even though I had asked Ryan for the perfume. I could go on and on about all the mean and hurtful things that Pat has done to me over the years...and I probably will go into some of them.

On this particular day, Pat was bragging about her "Sum ma Cum Laude" made-up status on her 'degree' in Psychology when she really just wanted to brag without anybody finding out what her degree was in. This angered Pat so that her eyes turned red that I had made her reveal what she was bragging about so openly, because of all the people she could fool with a Psych degree, it was not her family. We knew about all her mental breakdowns and psycho babble and lies.

Seeing my sister on the ropes and being so easily rattled by the subject she brought up, I pushed her a little farther, just for fun. I asked Pat what she learned from Psychology. Furious and with a little spittle forming on the side of her mouth, she leaned into me, nose to nose, and screamed  "I know you're crazy!!" To which I replied not missing a beat "Look in the mirror". So goes her 'professionalism' in Psych on the hospital floor with staff walking by. LOL

Then it was time to go in to visit my brother with colon cancer. The surgeon, Dr. Page, removed all the cancer from his colon and hopefully he won't have any more cancers spring up. He's had enough.